Perceived Changes in Sexuality during the COVID-19 Pandemic among Adults in the United States
Abstract
:1. Introduction
2. Materials and Methods
2.1. Participants
2.2. Data Analysis
3. Results
3.1. Purpose of Sex
It makes me realize that sex and companionship is important especially when it’s not so easily accessible. (23, woman, heterosexual, Black/African American, dating casually, partner living separately but visit with them periodically even during social lockdown).
Sex feels more about connecting and is more of a comfort measure. I feel more connected to my partner because we have more time together than before—lounging in bed in the morning instead of rushing to the gym, taking walks at lunch, etc. Overall—I feel like we are still having the same amount of sex, but the general partnership is outweighing it…I feel more complete and settled. My sexuality is in all parts of me—not just A part of me. (43, woman, heterosexual, White, in a committed relationship with one person, partner living with me as usual/partner is living with me as part of lockdown but does not usually).
I’ve begun viewing it more as an activity to pass the time (23, woman, heterosexual, White, dating casually, do not have a partner nor living with an ex).
I am reading “Come as You Are” during my quarantine, which has increased my self-compassion around body and sex, and changed my understanding of sex. (24, woman, bisexual, White, in a committed relationship with one person, partner living separately but visit with them periodically even during social lockdown).
3.2. Sexual Identity/Being
My sexual being in the past 3 months has varied. Sometimes I do not have the desire to do engage in sexual activities for a long period of time (about a month, sometimes more). My desires vary as well which is why I may find myself thinking I could be pansexual vs. bisexual. (22, woman, bisexual, Black/African American, in a committed relationship with one person, partner living with me as usual).
I perceive myself less sexual because I don’t get ready like I would if I was going out and about. (28, woman, heterosexual, White, in a committed relationship with one person, partner living with me as usual).
My sexual identity has expanded to include more people than I would be attracted to in the past—I am more attracted to people who seem to have healthy relationship habits and appear safe, as opposed to my previous attractions that were based on high risk and high attraction. I feel attracted to people I think I will be safe with, as so much feels threatened and unsafe right now. Even though I have SO MUCH privilege as a white woman not working on the front-lines—the threat of death feels so much closer than it has ever felt in my life. My perception of attractive people has evolved. (26, woman, queer, White, dating casually, do not have a partner nor living with an ex).
3.3. Sex Drive and Desire: Decreased
I typically have a low sex drive/low interest in having sex and that has changed a bit in the last 3 months. I am less stressed by work (I don’t like working from home but apparently it’s “good” for me) and therefore feel more connected to my partner and more interested in sex as a result. This hasn’t translated to actually having more sex or more masturbation, but I do feel less stressed about “needing to have sex” these days. I definitely miss being able to be physically present with and hug/touch friends, though, which I consider to be an important part of how I relate and interact with others. Only having my partner as a source of physical contact is strange and isn’t entirely satisfying (27, woman, heterosexual, White, in a committed relationship with one person, partner living with me as usual).
[My sexual being] has changed due to spending more time with my partner as we quarantined together for 3 weeks. I have realized that my sex drive fluctuates drastically even when externally nothing much has changed. I also [realized] some of my physical limitations and challenges in expressing these limitations. (28, woman, heterosexual, queer, White, in a committed relationship with one person/other, partner living separately but visit with them periodically even during social lockdown/other).
I feel more empowered/strong because I don’t feel needy about sex or worry about rejection because I don’t desire it as much. (26, woman, heterosexual, White, in a committed relationship with one person, partner living with me as usual).
I haven’t related to anyone physically in any way for the past 3 months. This is different than normal. (53, woman, heterosexual, Middle Eastern/North African, dating casually, partner living separately and I cannot visit with them during lockdown).
It makes sense that when I’m stressed out, I can’t relax enough to get aroused as often as usual. (30, woman, bisexual, White, in a committed relationship with one person, partner living with me as usual).
As I further myself into stressed out mode, sex grows far distant, and when it’s asked of me, my body physically rejects it. I twitch and squirm. (29, woman, bisexual, White, in a committed relationship with one person, partner living with me as usual).
I have had little to no interest in sex. I work as a therapist, so I have been feeling emotionally exhausted, and this leaves me with little emotional energy to want to be sexual or physically affectionate with my partner. (26, woman, heterosexual, White, in a committed relationship with one person, partner living with me as usual).
Less time to think about sex, let alone engage in it. There is little privacy for intimacy in a house with 2 small children, the only time being at night or when they are otherwise supervised. One can supervise due to social distancing restrictions, and by the time we make it to the end of the day and the kids are in bed, we’re both too exhausted and/or forced to jump back on computers to finish more work. (40, man, heterosexual, White, in a committed relationship with one person, partner living with me as usual).
I have noticed that I am less interested in sex. This happens usually when I am having anxious episodes, which is often during the lockdown. I find it hard to orgasm or get aroused when my mind is stressed about the virus, unemployment. (26, woman, heterosexual, White, in a committed relationship with one person, partner living with me as usual).
I am worried my medicine and the current state of the world is affecting my sex drive. It worries me because I have a boyfriend and don’t want him to feel like it’s because I’m not attracted to him. (25, woman, heterosexual, White, in a committed relationship with one person, partner is living with me as part of lockdown but does not usually).
My sexual being has slowed down tremendously. It is mostly out of fear of getting the virus and passing on the virus to others. I feel like during a pandemic we all have a social responsibility to be as strategic as possible when it comes to lessening social interaction, which includes my sex life. Since I haven’t been able to be sexual with others, I have been practicing more masturbation… If anything, it shows me that I am stronger and can be more independent when it comes to sexual pleasure. (22, man, gay, White, single, not dating, do not have a partner nor living with an ex).
3.4. Sex Drive and Desire: Increased
In the past 3 months, I would say I haven’t interacted with anyone other than my family members. I remember of being out everyday before the lockdown, but now I haven’t step [sic] out of the house in the past 2 months. Also, I am not able to meet my girlfriend in this period. So talking about sexual desires, yes they have increased and am urging to go out, meet other people, interact with them. (23, man, heterosexual, Asian, in a committed relationship with one person, partner living separately and I cannot visit with them during lockdown).
I’ve been having more sex, wanting it more and willing to try new things… I’m more willing to ask for what I want, the way I want it (34, woman, heterosexual, Black/African American, in a committed relationship with one person, partner living with me as usual).
I’ve become more open discussing my sexual interests with friends and sexual partners. (22, woman, bisexual, White, dating casually, partner living separately but visit with them periodically even during social lockdown).
I feel more open to sexual interaction. (34, woman, bisexual, White, in a committed relationship with one person, partner living with me as usual).
3.5. Sex Drive and Desire: Fluctuations
When the quarantine first started masturbation was a great way for me to have a good time and take my mind off things. I even bought a prostrate vibrator and lube and would spend more time doing it and learning how to have a better time. But since then my sex drive has plummeted and now I only masturbate (or fill out surveys about masturbating) to procrastinate writing my final paper. Its never instigated by any horniness anymore. (25, man, heterosexual, White, single, not dating, do not have a partner nor living with an ex).
My libido has been basically nonexistent this year, for reasons related to financial insecurity and mental health; through the first month of lockdown, that hadn’t changed. For some reason though, in the past week I’ve felt some surprising stirrings and now I’m kinda ready to go at the drop of a hat. (37, man, heterosexual, White, in a committed relationship with one person, partner living separately but visit with them periodically even during social lockdown).
My libido has decreased, my attraction to my roommate has increased, my desire for other sexual partners has increased, my desire for power exchange has increased, I’m flipping between feeling both less secure in my body and more certain of being sexy—they both happen and it fluctuates. (31, woman, bisexual, pansexual, queer, White, in a committed relationship with more than one person, partner living with me as usual/partner living separately and I cannot visit with them during lockdown/partner living separately but visit with them periodically even during social lockdown).
3.6. Increased Experimentation and Reflection
In the last 3 months, I have been more sexually aroused and stimulated. I have a newer partner so it’s been fun doing some new things. (23, woman, heterosexual, Black/African American, dating casually, partner living separately but visit with them periodically even during social lockdown).
I feel more of an empowerment of self-discovery since I did rely heavily on sexual thought/self-stimulation prior to the pandemic, but now I use several other tasks to please myself. (23, man, heterosexual, Asian, in a committed relationship with one person, partner living separately but visit with them periodically even during social lockdown).
I have so much time to explore my own thoughts, desires, philosophy related to sex. I have so much time to be present with myself in a way I never have before. I read “Pleasure Activism” by Adrienne Marie Brown, went to therapy up to two times a week, and got to write out all my thoughts and feelings. I got high (using tinctures after I was convinced to stop smoking) and used that to do some deep reflection and enjoy sex with myself or my husband for a longer time. (28, woman, bisexual, pansexual, queer, White, other, partner living with me as usual).
I think my libido is a little higher, but mostly the same. I do feel like I’m really enjoying the chance to have daytime sex. Usually, because I work and am in grad school, I’m not home during the days so sex is relegated to night times and weekends. However, due to sexual trauma in my past, I sometimes don’t like having sex when it’s dark because I find it triggering. So I’m really enjoying the chance to have sex in the afternoon with my partner! (26, woman, heterosexual, bisexual, White, in a committed relationship with one person, partner living with me as usual).
I was in a long-distance relationship even before the pandemic, but expecting to see partner within the next month or so. unsure when we’ll see each other again. Conversations definitely more sexual, more picture sending, etc. (22, woman, heterosexual, White, in a committed relationship with one person, partner living separately and I cannot visit with them during lockdown).
Have tried things I had not prior (virtual mutual masturbation). (33, man, heterosexual, Black/African American, dating casually, do not have a partner nor living with an ex).
I love self pleasure. I finally found a toy that works for me and my body and have been exploring using that toy in new and interesting ways. (36, woman, asexual, Asian, single, not dating, do not have a partner nor living with an ex).
I purchased a male chastity device. I’m happy it’s helped cut down on the temptation to masturbate. (51, man, other sexual identity, White, single, not dating, do not have a partner nor living with an ex).
My interest in BDSM and kinky sex has increased in the last 3 months. (35, man, heterosexual, White, in a committed relationship with one person, partner living with me as usual).
4. Discussion
4.1. Changes in Sex Drive and Desire
4.2. Changes in Sexual Practices
4.3. Changes in the Purpose of Sex
4.4. Changes in Sexual Identity
4.5. Empowerment/Disempowerment
4.6. Strengths and Limitations
5. Conclusions
Author Contributions
Funding
Institutional Review Board Statement
Informed Consent Statement
Data Availability Statement
Conflicts of Interest
Appendix A
We refer below to “sexual being”. We mean your perception of yourself sexually, your sexual behaviors, your ways of interacting/relating to others, your desires/attractions, among other things. How has your sexual being changed in the last 3 months? |
How have those changes influenced your larger sense of self, or how you see yourself? |
How have those changes influenced your sense of empowerment, or feeling capable and strong? |
Thinking about your current circumstances, what would “risky” sex be for you? |
Have you had any changes in engaging in “risky” sex over the last 3 months? |
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Bowling, J.; Montanaro, E.; Guerrero-Ordonez, S.; Joshi, S.; Gioia, D. Perceived Changes in Sexuality during the COVID-19 Pandemic among Adults in the United States. Sexes 2021, 2, 331-344. https://doi.org/10.3390/sexes2030026
Bowling J, Montanaro E, Guerrero-Ordonez S, Joshi S, Gioia D. Perceived Changes in Sexuality during the COVID-19 Pandemic among Adults in the United States. Sexes. 2021; 2(3):331-344. https://doi.org/10.3390/sexes2030026
Chicago/Turabian StyleBowling, Jessamyn, Erika Montanaro, Sarai Guerrero-Ordonez, Stuti Joshi, and Diana Gioia. 2021. "Perceived Changes in Sexuality during the COVID-19 Pandemic among Adults in the United States" Sexes 2, no. 3: 331-344. https://doi.org/10.3390/sexes2030026